A Person You Don't Want To Think About, But….

O Man! What kind of a person are you? Never disclose yourself to anyone. Never tell anyone about what you're going through? Keeping yourself mute and looking at the ceiling is not going to help you, my friend. Staring at the moon, counting stars, having sleepless nights, roaming around the streets cluelessly, talking less, putting yourself in hardship will never ever help you. So, for God’s sake tell me what's the problem? Why are you so lost for the last few months? Is there any girl who ditched you? Did she dump you? And more importantly, Who's she? And why are you not able to move on after all this time? And if you're not able to do so. If you're not able to move on. If you're not able to get yourself rid of all these feelings and emotions. If you can't run from her remembrance and longing and can't stop yourself from thinking about her. Just talk to her and sort all this out and try to bring things on the right track. Because sitting like this and doing nothing won't change anything. Come on get up, brace yourself, take a deep breath and call her.

The guy who was sitting quietly all this time and was listening to his friend until now, simply blinked his eyes and gave a strange look to his friend in a way that completely shook his friend from inside and gave him goosebumps and broke him into cold sweat. Somehow, he braced himself and barely collected a few words again and asked, "Do you still love her?". "Don't know". He replied without looking at him. "Are you missing her right now?" His friend asked him again. "Don't know", he repeated his previous answer but this time tears rolled out on his cheeks dropping from his eyes.

Bursting in tears, he started speaking and unveiling what he was hiding from everyone or maybe from himself too. Yes, you're right, I am in love with someone who can't ever be mine ever and I can't go away from her remembrance ever. And what did you say earlier, “Any girl who ditched me or dumped me?”. No, bro, she didn’t ditch me or dump me or cheated on me because she never was mine, she never ever accepted me as her partner despite being aware of my feelings. Not because she wasn’t feeling the same way I am feeling but because she is not an emotional fool and that is because when she thinks, she thinks logically and practically whereas, as said I am an emotional fool and when I fall for someone, I don’t bring my reasoning skills, my logical thinking and my practical approach in the way of my beloved and this is where I failed.

You know what is the fun fact here in my story? (Making fun of his own self) he said, “the fun fact here is that I am still a prisoner of his ringlets. I am still a Bismil (half slaughtered in love) of her smile whereas on the other hand, I know, she doesn’t even think about me and I mean barely thinking, not the way I think about her, the way I remember her, the way I am talking with you about her. However, she is not bound to remember me because she didn’t make any promise to me about anything. In fact, she stated all her statements with complete honesty and that is why it is getting hard for me to move on irrespective of the fact that I am also, don’t want to think about her but I just can’t hold my emotions and don’t have any control over myself when it comes about her.” Having said that, he rubbed his eyes, wiped out his tears and walked away from the room.

His friend was happy that at least, rolling out of the tears unveiled behind the scenes of our grieving Romeo and somehow, he explained the reasons behind his sorrow and grief.

Interestingly, when he walked out from the room, he was reciting Faiz Ahmad Faiz’s below couplet:

Kar Raha Tha Gham – E – Jahaa’n Ka Hisaab

Aaj Tum Yaad  ____________________________ Be Hisaab Aaye